you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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