And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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