I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize