Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
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