ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
it was like having sex with a tree stump
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize