Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
