I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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