what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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