i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
