Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
