Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
