I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
