Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
