i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
