It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
sex in a hospital.. check
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
