Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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