So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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