sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
wat bout pragnant strippers??
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize