Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
