RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
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