she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Randomize
