Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
