Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
