ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize