using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
