...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
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