Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
