accomplished twins. life is a go
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
