Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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