I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm šš»š
We are so blessed
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying āIM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND ITāS CHRISTMAS EEEEEVEā
Iām ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
donāt ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously donāt make the best life choices.
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