so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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