I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
