Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize