Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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