its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Randomize
