New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Randomize
