I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
