how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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