i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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