i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
