you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I understand Curling. That high.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize