did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
honey bunches of taint.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
