I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
