actually, I'm a sock model
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Randomize
