i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Randomize