guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
