last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize