Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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