Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Randomize
