i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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