Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
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