tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
